Sunday, March 6, 2011

Naked on the Subway (Part 1)


IT'S ONE YEAR SINCE I STARTED CLIMB TO NOWHERE. THANK YOU TO ALL OF MY FOLLOWERS. YOU'RE THE BEST! IN THE SPIRIT OF FUN I'M REPOSTING THE STORY THAT STARTED IT ALL!

Right now, I’m naked on the subway. I’m afraid to sit in fear of showing my crotch. Is this my life? Really? The 9 train is moving fast, but my heart is racing faster. I’m. Naked. On. The. Subway. What? My mind flies in every direction.

I wish there was some crazy hook up story of random hot anonymous stranger sex, but instead it’s a story of laziness. I’m not a morning person, and I’ve never wanted to be one. Let’s face it, morning people are annoying. But this was one day when I wished I had that sunny can-do attitude that my morning counterparts seem to pull off effortlessly. I can be sunny, just not before 10 a.m.

I was living in Hoboken and working in Manhattan. The entire commute was 30 minutes

door-to-door. I was a sales rep selling something else this time, and I went to work late everyday. I had the best boss, a total hottie, who made a great deal with me. Hottie Boss said, “Do well and you can do whatever you want.” I love that phrase, “Do whatever you want.” It has a wonderful ring to it. My sales were always at the top which allowed me to sleep in everyday. Fantastic, I know.

Hottie Boss called me into his office the day before my naked trip to work and stressed that I needed to be on time for work tomorrow. This meant being in the office by 8 o’clock in the morning. I said, “No problem,” but he gave me a look and said, "I'm serious.

There’s a big meeting, and you can’t be late.” All of a sudden I’m not allowed to be late? What kind of job is this? No wink, no smile, no pat on my ass- what’s going on?

I needed to pick up my suits at the dry cleaners, and then all I had to do was get up on time. Simple. I got into the elevator to go home, when I ran into a few friends, who invited me to grab drinks with them. Luckily, there was time for drinks and picking up the suits. But then I stumbled back to my apartment drunk around 11 p.m. As I was falling asleep, I remembered the suits. How could I forget? Alcohol is evil. I guess I’d have to wake up even earlier than I was supposed to and do it in the morning.

Of course, I overslept. It was almost 7:15, when I remembered all my suits were at the dry cleaners. I had nothing else to wear. I needed those suits. The only way I could get to work on time was to get dressed at the dry cleaners. I threw on my bra, panties and my very short raincoat. Some thought it was a blazer, but it was just a really, really short coat.

I threw on pantyhose. Can anything be more uncomfortable or ugly? Pantyhose should never be on your legs. They should only be worn over your face to rob someone, but the company I worked at was very conservative, so I threw on pantyhose.

I had on a bra, panties, pantyhose, 4-inch heels and my “blazer” raincoat. At another time- definitely not in the morning- with a garter and maybe a pair of handcuffs, this could’ve been the beginning of a fun fantasy sex romp. No such luck. I needed to get to work on time. I didn’t want to let Hottie Boss down.

I ran to the dry cleaners as fast as I could. And it was there that my non-morning person attitude got me into trouble.


TO BE CONTINUED...




16 comments:

  1. Congrats!!! Thanks for sharing such entertaining writing over the year.(^_^)

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  2. Congrats on the year! I'm assuming that dressed like that it would have been easier to talk your way out of trouble with your boss? I'm just guessing that things didn't go well at the dry-cleaners.

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  3. What a story! Congrats on your first year!!!

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  4. haha.... this is going to be interesting.

    Cant wait for part II

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  5. Congratulations on your first year of blogging! The story can only end badly I fear. I have a feeling the folks at the dry cleaners were less than helpful. *lol*

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  6. "I had on a bra, panties, pantyhose, 4-inch heels and my “blazer” raincoat. At another time- definitely not in the morning- with a gun tucked in your garter, you'd have been a Bond's girl on a mission.lol

    Happy Bloggo-versary!

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  7. A whole year! Congratulations! Loved this story then, loving it now! Of course I don't think I was reading you a year ago, but I went back and read all your previous posts cause you are just that good a writer and I love living vicariously through you! :-D

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  8. Oh girl! I have a black silk Gucci trench coat that I always wear over bra's and panties with stilettos. It's not too short though. That might be tacky. LOL!

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  9. Can't wait for the continuation!

    Happy Blogiversary!

    xoxox,
    CC

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  10. Congrats on an entire year of being AMAZING. Thanks for inspiring me every day.

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  11. Ooooh ok sexyy :p
    lol when i saw "naked on the subway".. i really thought u meant literally naked :p
    luv this blog already and i've only read one post,lol
    happy blog-o-versay :)

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  12. Well at least you were wearing underwear and obviously a NY attitude, otherwise people may have really noticed what you were NOT wearing.
    Looking forward to Part III!

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  13. happy 1 year! been enjoying the posts :)

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  14. Happy One year--and WE are the Lucky Ones! You sure you didn't Get Lucky? I SWEAR the Word Ver- is: UNDER!!!!!

    :-)

    J

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